I was listening to the lyrics of the song, "Walking a Tightrope" from The Greatest Showman soundtrack today. Instead of my kids bellowing out (hey-they were actually playing quietly upstairs!) the words I found myself crying out the lyrics to this song.... and it taught me.
It never ceases to amaze me how God loves us enough to use the smallest things to teach us rich truths.
Like the speeding ticket I got this week. First one ever-not that I haven't ever deserved one until now! I had no idea I was speeding. But after the visit with the officer I accepted my well-deserved ticket and drove away asking God, "what do you want me to learn from this?" In the silent, empty space of our 12 passenger van, it was Jesus and I sitting there and He said, "slow down". I thought, "Yeah? duh!?" But then the Holy Spirit spoke firmly and reminded me of Psalm 46:10. "Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth." He uses the smallest, the painful, the stressful times to teach us RICH truth that only HE can teach. He is so good.
So much has happened in my family in the last month that life can feel like things are speeding by at an uncontrollable velocity. (Matt always loved that word) But He loves us more than we can imagine or determine. He does! His grasp is firm and complete.
Life has felt like a circus this last month. Many days spent just surviving mixed with days of thriving. Rushing rather than resting. SO much to get through.
I stood in my kitchen cooking Thai food, listening to the lyrics of a human love song-- hear some of the lyrics that taught me.
Some people long for a life that is simple and planned.....tied with a ribbon.
Some people won't sail the sea 'cause they're safer on land...to follow what's written
But I'd follow you to the great unknown .......off to a world we call our own.
Isn't this so true? Yes, Lord, I long for a life that is simple and planned. (You know, the one I thought I was living that didn't include cancer, my husband dying and my kids becoming fatherless) I've tried to be the planner, the one trying to control the simple and complex in my life. But no amount of ribbon or bows can make my planning look pretty or perfect! And God has brought me to a safe place in Him over and over. (He is my refuge and strength)
I've lived in fear, pain and deep anguish/sorrow in my soul over the last 13 months. BUT GOD has brought me through it, He will always bring me through it. He promises to be bring us through the valley of the shadow of death. (Ps 23) So the idea of not "sailing on the sea (of life) because I feel "safer on land... to follow what's written" (in my plan) is a false safety. God is showing me new things, bringing refreshing into my life as I embrace "Following Him into the great unknown". It's beautiful when God uses pain in our lives to teach us His richness of character. ("I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me."-Ps 23)
Hand in my hand.....And we promised to never let go
We're walking the tightrope
High in the sky...we can see the whole world down below
We're walking the tightrope
Never sure, never know how far we could fall
But it's all an adventure
That comes with a breathtaking view
Walking a tightrope....with you
God has lavished great love on us, that we should be called children of God! (I John 3) His hand and my hand are clasped and cannot be separated. Who can separate us from the love of God? (Romans 8:35-39)
I am walking the tightrope with God. I cannot plan, I cannot determine my future but I can let His grasp on my life be sure. I "never know how far I could fall" but I know the One who holds my hand.
I love that "it's all an adventure with a breathtaking view". I love breathtaking views. And surely through the last 15 months the valleys have brought me to breathtaking views!
Mountains and valleys, and all that will come in between....desert and ocean
You pulled me in and together we're lost in a dream....always in motion
So I'd risk it all just to be with you.
Matt and I had so many mountains and valleys together in this life. We even lived near an ocean and in a desert! And we both had the privilege of knowing God through all of it. I had the privilege of being led by a man who honored God with his life and love of his family. I recently met with a young couple who are newly married and I told them something I've thought might have helped me at the beginning of married life , "Life will be hard, you will fail each other, you will not have a perfect or easy life. But you know THE perfect God, He will never fail you and He's already saved you. Delight yourself in Him and you can 'risk it all' in your obedience to His ways"!
"Never sure, will you catch me if I should fall?"
One line in the chorus that rings in my ears is the line above. If you know God, you know the answer. Yes, He will catch us when we fall. He will be my Deliverer, my Strong Tower, my Rescuer! Proverbs 18:10 says, "The name of the LORD is a fortified tower; the righteous run to it and are safe."
Who's ready for an adventure with a breathtaking view? There is even comfort on a tightrope...the great I AM is with you!